言语攻击性强的学生
Students usually become verbally abusive in frustrating situations that they see as being beyond their control. Anger and frustration become displaced from those situations to you. These students often feel they will be rejected and, therefore, reject you first. They often realize the drama and intimidation behind their anger and are aware of their impact, yet they feel they have nothing to lose.
DO
- Acknowledge their anger and frustration, e.g.“我听说你很生气.”
- Rephrase what they are saying and identify their emotion, e.g., “I can see how upset you are because you feel your rights are being violated and nobody will listen.”
- Allow them to vent, get their feelings out, and tell you what is upsetting them
- Reduce stimulation; invite the person to your office or other quiet place if this is comfortable.
- Consider keeping your office door open or inviting another faculty or staff member to join you.
- Tell them that you are not willing to accept their verbally abusive behavior, e.g., “When you yell and scream at me that way, I find it hard (impossible) to listen.”
- Tell them they are violating your personal space and to please move back (if they are getting physically too close), e.g., “Please stand back; you’re too close.”
- Help the student problem solve and deal with the real issues when they become calmer.
不
- Get into an argument or shouting match.
- Become hostile or punitive yourself, e.g.“你不能那样跟我说话.”
- Press for explanation or reasons for their behavior – “Now I’d like you to tell me exactly why you are so obnoxious.”
- Look away and not deal with the situation.
- Give away your own rights as a faculty or staff member.
- Hesitate to call Campus Security, (540) 678-4444 if the situation escalates.
The Violent Or Physically Destructive Student
暴力, 因为情绪困扰, is very rare and typically occurs only when the student is totally frustrated and feels there are no other options.
DO
- Prevent total frustration and 无助 by quickly and calmly acknowledging the intensity of the situation, e.g., “I can see you’re really upset and really mean business and have some serious concerns on your mind.”
- Explain clearly and directly what behaviors are acceptable, e.g., “You certainly have the right to be angry, but screaming, hitting (breaking things) is not O.K.”
- Get necessary help such as other staff, Campus Security, (540) 678-4444.
- 呆在空旷的地方.
- Divert attention and when all else fails, e.g.“如果你打我,我帮不了你。.”
不
- Ignore warning signs that the person is about to explode, e.g., yelling, screaming, clenched fists, statements like, “You’re leaving me no choice.”
- Threaten, dare, taunt, or push into a corner.
- 触摸.
滥用药物的学生
Given the stresses of university life, students are especially susceptible to drug abuse. A variety of substances are available that provide escape from pressing demands. The only problem is that these drugs soon create their own set of problems in the form of addiction, 易出事故,身体不好. 滥用最多的物质是酒精.
DO
- Be on the alert for signs of drug abuse (preoccupation with drugs, inability to participate in class activities, 课堂表现恶化, 记忆丧失或昏厥的时期).
- Share your honest concern for the person–Encourage him/her to seek help.
- Get necessary help in instances of intoxication, 电话咨询中心, (540) 665-4530 and/or the Blue Ridge Area Intergroup 24 hour hotline, (800) 835-6130.
不
- 忽略问题.
- 惩罚或训诫.
- Refer to your personal use of substances.
- 鼓励这种行为.
The Student In Poor 联系 With Reality
These students have difficulty distinguishing fantasy from reality. 他们的思维通常是不合逻辑的, 困惑, disturbed; they may coin new words, see or hear things that no one else can, 有不合理的信念, and exhibit bizarre or inappropriate behavior. Generally, these students are not dangerous and are very 困惑, frightened and overwhelmed.
DO
- Respond with warmth and kindness, but with firm reasoning.
- Remove extra stimulation of the environment and see them in a quiet atmosphere (if you are comfortable in doing so).
- Acknowledge your concerns and state that you can see they need help, e.g., “It seems very hard for you to integrate all these things that are happening and I am concerned about you, 我想帮忙.”
- Acknowledge the feelings or fears without supporting the misperceptions, e.g., “I understand you think they are trying to hurt you and I know how real it seems to you, 但我听不见那些声音).”
- Reveal your difficulty in understanding them (when appropriate), e.g., “I’m sorry but I don’t understand – could you repeat that or say it in a different way?”
- Focus on the “here and now” – switch topics and divert the focus from the irrational to the rational or the real.
- Speak to their healthy side, which they have – it’s O.K. to joke, laugh, or smile when appropriate.
- Refer the student to 咨询中心, (540) 665-4530.
不
- Argue or try to convince them of the irrationality of their thinking for it makes them defend their positions (false perceptions) more.
- 一起玩吧。.g., “Oh yeah, I hear the voices (or see the devil).”
- Encourage further revelations of their distorted thinking.
- 要求、命令或命令.
- 期待习惯的情绪反应.
多疑的学生
Typically, these students complain about something other than their psychological difficulties. They are tense, anxious, mistrustful and loners. They tend to interpret minor oversights as significant personal rejection and often overreact to insignificant occurrences. They see themselves as the focal point of everybody’s behavior and everything that happens has special meaning to them. They are overly concerned with fairness and being treated equally. Feelings of worthlessness and inadequacy underline most of their behavior. 他们看起来既能干又聪明.
DO
- Express compassion without intimate friendship – suspicious students have trouble with closeness.
- Be firm, steady, punctual, and consistent.
- Be specific and clear regarding standards of behavior you expect.
不
- Assure the student that you are his/her friend; agree you’re a stranger, 但即使是陌生人也会担心.
- 过分温暖和呵护.
- Flatter or participate in their games; you don’t know the rules.
- 可爱或幽默.
- Challenge or agree with any mistaken or illogical beliefs.
- 是模糊的.
抑郁的学生
Epidemiological studies show that at any given time, seven percent of the general population is clinically depressed. These students show a multitude of symptoms, e.g., 内疚, 低自尊, 无价值感, and inadequacy as well as physical symptoms such as a change in appetite, 难以入睡, 早期的觉醒, 对日常活动缺乏兴趣.
DO
- Let the student know you’re aware he/she is feeling down and you would like to help.
- Reach out more than halfway and encourage the student to express how she/he is feeling. Depressed students are often initially reluctant to talk, yet others’ attention helps the student feel more worthwhile.
- 告诉学生你的关心, 咨询咨询中心, (540) 665-4530 and/or the National Foundation for Depressive Illness, (800) 239-1265.
不
- Say, “Don’t worry”,”Crying won’t help”, or “Everything will be better tomorrow.”
- Be afraid to ask whether the student is suicidal if you think he/she may be.
自杀的学生
Suicide is the third leading cause of death among college students. The suicidal student is intensely ambivalent about killing himself/herself and typically responds to help; suicidal states are definitely time limited and most who commit suicide are neither crazy nor psychotic. Sometimes a recent loss may trigger thoughts of death with no real interest in taking one’s life. High risk indicators include feelings of hopelessness, 无助, and futility; a severe loss or threat of loss; a detailed suicidal plan; history of a previous attempt; history of alcohol or drug abuse; and feelings of alienation and isolation. Its more than depression, it’s a feeling of complete giving up of life and all of its routine tasks. Suicidal students usually want to communicate their feelings and the inability to do so results in a rage or anger directed toward themselves.
DO
- Take it seriously – 75 percent of all people who commit suicide give some warning of their intentions to a friend or family member.
- Be willing to listen – even if professional help is needed, a student will be more willing to seek help if you have listened to him or her.
- Voice your concern – take the initiative to ask what is troubling the student and let them know how concerned you are.
- 立即寻求专业帮助.
- If occurs during office hours (9am-5pm) bring the student to the Wellness Center in Racey Hall to see one of our Counselors.
- 下班后, call 911 and/or encourage them to call the local 24 hour crisis line at Winchester Crisis Care, (540) 536-8152 at Winchester Medical Center.
- They can also contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, (800) 273-8255.
不
- Assume the situation will take care of itself.
- 发誓保守秘密.
- Act shocked or surprised at what the person says.
- 挑战或大冒险.
- 争论或辩论道德问题.
焦虑和压力大的学生
Most of us live, work, teach and learn in a complex and stressful world. Epidemiological studies indicate that at any given time 17 percent of the general population is suffering with clinical levels of anxiety.
DO
- Listen and let them express their feelings and thoughts – sincere listening alone often relieves a great deal of pressure.
- Be clear and explicit with what your expectations are for your class.
- 保持冷静.
- Encourage the student to attend a stress management workshop or make an appointment to see a Counselor
Other Stress management and emotional wellness links:
不
- Minimize the severity of anxiety symptoms.
- Argue about how bad things are or tell them they will “snap out of it” soon.
- Get frustrated when your suggestions are resisted.
The contents of this handout are adapted from San Diego State University and are the product of the combined efforts of 咨询中心s who comprise the Organization of 咨询中心 Directors in Higher Education (OCCDHE).